The day Jordan got hurt crushed Jezebel. She almost lost him forever, his kids with Sadie almost lost their father, their kids almost lost the best father they would ever have before they could even meet him. The day he woke up in the hospital broke her. She had spent every day, as long as she possibly could, in that room by his side, begging for him to wake up. She knew there was a chance he wouldn’t, that he would die, but she never expected that there was somehow a worse option… that he wouldn’t remember the past 10 years, about them getting married, about their kids. Even alive and physically fine, she had lost the love of her life, and in a way, their kids had lost their father. They had lost one of the things Jezebel wanted most for them, what she couldn’t do for Laurel, two parents who would be there for everything, every milestone, and every step of the way. Two parents who would be there to show them love, teamwork, the importance of family, and how to deal with everything that comes both good and bad. These kids were supposed to have everything that her and Jordan never had growing up, everything she wanted for Laurel but couldn’t give her, but nothing was what it was supposed to be.
Perhaps there was a small part of Jezebel that hoped for things to take a turn for the better, but perhaps that was why it all hurt so much. Every morning that she didn’t wake up in Jordan’s arms was a letdown. During the night when she couldn’t sleep because she couldn’t find a comfortable position, or had a bad dream caused by all of her worries and fears, he was supposed to be there. He wasn’t there. Jordan wasn’t there when she needed him most. Dan was taking care of Val, and Jess was doing her best to take care of Jezebel, but it wasn’t enough. Nothing was enough to keep Jezebel from hurting, to keep her heart from breaking a little more each day. When it was clear that Jordan knew what was actually the present, that they had gotten married, that she was pregnant with his children, nothing got better, only worse. He didn’t believe the truth. The worst was that he didn’t even believe that their kids were his. Something which he proved by requesting a paternity test. Jezebel knew they were his, everyone knew without a doubt, except Jordan because he didn’t want to believe it. There wasn’t even a way to prove it until after they were born, not without putting them at higher risk. That was one thing Jezebel wasn’t willing to do. She wouldn’t do anything to increase risks for them if she could help it. Her stress and fear, how laurel was born, and even her age added risks. All she wanted was to take care of them, even if their father wouldn’t believe they were his kids.
Even with her family being there for her, Jezebel felt alone and she felt like a failure. A failure as a wife, as Jordan’s wife, like she could have done something better, something more, been more to keep him from being hurt in the first place. If she could’ve been more, maybe things would have been different, maybe he would have remembered more, maybe he would believe the truth right in front of him. Maybe… maybe she would deserve him. Maybe she didn’t deserve him, they weren’t meant to be, maybe the love of her life was never supposed to be hers, maybe he was supposed to go back to someone else, to Sadie. Maybe this was the universe’s way of making things right for how she had inadvertently ruined Jordan and Sadie’s marriage in the first place, just by telling him the truth. A failure as a sister, cousin, daughter, and friend. She couldn’t help Val while Dan had been gone, she couldn’t help bring Dan back to reality where Val needed him, she couldn’t work, which added so much more pressure onto her dad and Emmy. They had to pick up everything that her and Daniel would do. Then Jess, she had brought her family to Beryl, just to take care of her and Val. Now, even with Dan back for Val, Jess was still trying to pick up the pieces as Jezebel was falling apart, when she should have had to. Jezebel knew it added a lot of pressure to her that she didn’t need. Then, most of all, Jezebel felt like a complete failure as a mother. She was failing to take care of Laurel. She was too overwhelmed to be able to help her, even if Laurel would let her try. Laurel had been spiraling and Jezebel couldn’t help her. She couldn’t come in and fix things, to make it all better like she would when Laurel was little and relied on her for everything, when life was simpler. Then the triplets, Jezebel felt like she had already failed them. She was failing at keeping her own stress down, she felt like she wouldn’t be enough for them. She did her best with Laurel, but she had still failed her, how would she be able to do any better with three? Not without Jordan. Jezebel knew him, he was someone who would always be the best father a kid could ask for, but this situation changes things. If he didn’t trust Jezebel, what would he do? Would he still be the same Jordan the kids deserved even if he wanted nothing to do with her? Would they have to go back and forth between them, or would they only have her or Jordan? If it did come to that, would they be better off with Jordan? Though, if they were, what would be left of Jezebel’s heart? She couldn’t bear the thought of losing them in any way, even if she was scared that she could never be enough for them, be the mother they deserve, be enough to protect them. She wasn’t just scared of it, she truly felt like she wasn’t good enough for them, like there was no way she could be enough and worth having as a mother, wife, or family.
Even if there was a small part of her holding out hope, she couldn’t find that hope. She was scared, and she knew it was only a matter of time before he would ask for a divorce. He wanted Sadie. That’s what it came down to. He wanted her, not Jezebel, and if that was it, she could respect it. She wanted Jordan to be happy, even if he wanted someone that wasn’t her, and they couldn’t be more than friends. No matter how much it would hurt, she would respect it, but not like this. This was too much, but she knew what was coming. She knew that any time she would find divorce papers being given to her, but the last thing she expected was when they did show up.
For the first time in months, Jezebel was having a day that actually wasn’t bad. For once she wasn’t wishing to just lay in bed under the covers and cry. With Jess, came her kids and Dorian, so by chance he was roped up into helping chaperone the Cerulean high prom that night, and because of that and how Shay had seen her cousins’ outfits, the kids wanted to go to prom. With a quick call to an event planner, Jezebel’s backyard became home to a kid’s prom for the night, with spaces set up for the kids to wear dresses and suits just for them and makeup, places for the kids to dance and play, and even space for the parents of the neighborhood children to stay to the side with drinks to chat and watch their kids have fun. As tiring as it was for her, Jezebel loved going around the neighborhood with Shay and Zoe to invite everyone to come. It was nice to have that time with Jess’s kids, and seeing how excited they were made her smile. Before long, her backyard was filled with the sounds of children having fun. It was something Jezebel loved to hear more than anything. It was something that could bring a smile to her face, even when she felt broken. That’s why Jezebel had found herself not staying to the side with the parents, but right in with all the kids, helping them with makeup and just watching them have fun right up close. The kids made her smile. Knowing she was helping make their day even better, making certain they had fun, made everything feel right, even if just for a moment, distracting her from her life.
The day quickly began to change from anything Jezebel could’ve expected. Jess had been welcoming people in, but when Jezebel saw Jess again, there was someone with her that was entirely unexpected to say the least. Malachi Azure. Glancing back over in their direction after a moment, Jezebel didn’t see Jess, but saw Kai heading back inside where Jess had likely gone. Jezebel took a second to quickly text Dorian, just so he would be aware. Although, Dan would have to wait and find out later. Nobody needed Dan getting involved in the situation unless it couldn’t be handled otherwise.
To: Dorian DeLoughrey
Just as a heads up, Kai is here. Jess has everything under control, but I thought you should be aware.
Jezebel knew Jess would have the situation with Kai handled. She didn’t need someone else stepping in, and it was better for her to deal with him herself after all that happened with them, so Jezebel let them be and continued on as if nothing had changed. She played with the kids, and did their makeup, letting them have fun and make her smile. However, that moment where Jezebel felt alright eventually came to an abrupt halt. The smile she had disappeared as soon as she heard his voice. She looked to him, meeting his eyes for just a second before looking away. That moment she had both expected and feared had come true. Her husband wanted a divorce. Her eyes went to the papers in his hand, and by then she was fighting back tears. She didn’t want to let any of the kids see her cry. [color= #049fe0]“Not… not right here, please… not now…”[/color] She looked down to Aidan next to her, hugging her. He knew she wasn’t alright. [color= #049fe0]“Hey Aidan, buddy, go find your sisters, ok. Can you go do that for me, please? I’ll be right back.”[/color]
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@astxrism - Texted Dori