It was harder than Daiane thought it would be to be standing with Embry on the prom dance floor like this, a canyon of unspoken words between them, when she could see them dancing on this same floor, all laughter and smiles instead of this thick, awkward tension. The words spilled out, as they always did when she felt tense or awkward or this both, but they, as always, did nothing to relieve the jittery nervousness that pattered in her aching chest.
”You’re really talented so it really can’t be that surprising that I liked it. I knew that—that you were talented—but getting something like that…” She shook her head, trailing off. Her words, suddenly, felt a little intimate to her—which was exactly what she was trying to avoid, being that the whole problem was that she used her relationship with Embry to complete her tasks. Embry wasn’t stupid; this was prom, she had to know that there was a possibility any interaction Daiane had with her could be laced with tasks. Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me—and Embry was no fool, as she’d made abundantly clear. Nor was she someone Dai wanted to make a fool out of. So she paused, mentally scrambling to pull away from the far from platonic feelings she was feeling and into a more neutral territory. ”It was just, great. So, like, thank you. …And, um, I know it doesn’t really… exactly, apply anymore, so if you—if you wanted it back or something, I don’t know, you can—I can give it to you.” The words kind of tumbled out of her mouth before she even knew what she was saying, and now with them out in the air, she wished she could pull them back; she loved the portrait too much. But the storm had already struck its worst, leaving scattered debris and damage in its wake, and all she could hope for was a chance to rebuild. ”If you want it.”
Surprised, her gaze shifted from whichever random object it had focussed on to settle on Embry, confusion apparent in Dai’s dark eyes. Looking at her, she thought that she could see a note of genuineness in her expression—as if Embry wanted her to know she truly meant what she was saying. Then, Dai realized, at once, that part of her rambling might have come off as passive-aggressive, like a remark of hers (unintentionally(?)) alluded to some hurtful comment Embry had previously made during that fight. Embry’s reply made more sense with that context; it was a reflexive response, made more to keep the peace than as a reflection of her actual feelings. It must have been her own wishful thinking that she saw, some irrational sort of hope reflected in Embry’s eyes. After all, it had been more than a month of silence between the two of them—who was she to expect anything more than that? In response, Daiane gave an uncertain nod, choosing to let the sentence pass without another word on her part.
That final remorseful statement sort of floated past Daiane’s head, and she recognized it only as an unfinished sentence, where an unspoken “but” lingered just behind Embry’s tongue. “No, actually, you were right,” Dai responded, a rueful smile curving her lips. “I’ve thought about it a lot since then and, and that was really sh*tty of me. I’m sorry, Embry, really, I never meant to hurt you or lie to you. I just—f*ck.” She cut herself off, crossing her arms across her chest as her gaze fell to the floor, blinking back the sudden sting of tears. “… You don’t wanna hear my excuses and I don’t wanna waste your time so if you… if you just wanted to yell at me some more, you don’t need to, I get it. I—and my tasks—will stay away from you, so don’t even worry about it.”