-outside the party_
What a day he’d had. A winning night. All around, how could he be any happier?
Well there had been a slight mishap, but he could deal with that later. Right now, he was taking it in. The afterglow. He’d spent the night dancing, losing himself in the energy of it all, and now here he was outside, catching his breath.
The muffled pulse of the party still drifted from inside, and he liked hearing it fade into the night air. He wondered how late it would go. Until the sun rises, he hoped.
He watched Mona’s fingers reach for the cigarette. They were delicate but moved quickly and he smirked. She adjusted her grip, turning it in her hand. He hoped she realized one end was still hot. He’d burned himself plenty of times before, mostly from messing around while smoking and not paying attention. Clumsy.
When she shook her head no in response to his earlier question about whether she’d smoked before, he only nodded. He took a drag from his own, let it sit in his chest a moment, then turned his head and exhaled the smoke in a slow stream to the side.
She coughed.
He laughed quietly. Not to mock her, but to comfort. “ Don’t worry,” he said, voice easy and amused. “ Happens to everyone. I swear, I almost threw up the first time I smoked.”
He had offered her the spot next to him beneath the tree. Though the day had been warm, the night was cooler now under the moon, and a slight breeze had picked up.
He watched her lean her head back against the trunk, resting it there with a kind of gentle surrender.
“ I love being outside,” he said, mostly to himself but loud enough for her to hear. He didn’t expect a response. “ I think if I could, I’d never go inside again.”
He thought of the island. Of the woods across the water. He’d explored every inch of them. Spent more nights than he could count sleeping under the stars, letting the hum of insects and the wind in the trees carry him off to sleep.
She coughed again, and this time he only smiled.
“Winning feels good.” The words were a quiet reflection more than anything. He felt like he’d been winning all night. But when would that come crashing down? When would he start to lose againn? Lose her? Lose it? His mind? All of it? When. That was the real question. Not if.
He turned his head toward her.
“Feels fuckin’ good, doesn’t it?” he asked, his voice softer now but laced with something deeper. He leaned his shoulder into hers, adjusting slightly against the tree.
He could feel the warmth of her bare skin against his. That little contact said everything he didn’t want to speak aloud.