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Okay, you can read this rant or skip…
I CAN’T HIT HIGH NOTES!!
I dunno why or how or whatever! I could hit them perfectly when I was in school or anywhere else. Since I stopped going to my music classes due to corona I couldn’t hit them anymore! A month or something after the lock down (there was a lock down in India from March to April or something) my teacher started taking online classes from home. So, I got back in music and well, my voice was okay. After 2 months or so, my voice started becoming crappy and I couldn’t hit both low or high notes! I dunno what’s happening!! I finished my class today which was in the evening and I’m writing this rant rn. My voice was really fxcking shxtty this time! Worse than before. I FEEL LIKE SLAPPING MY VOICE OR SOMETHING! I dunno if it’s because I lost confidence or something, blah blah blah, because I haven’t been socialising much or if I was like this before. MY VOICE WILL BE FXCKING AMAZING WHEN I’M PRACTICING BY MYSELF OR WHEN I’M WITH MY FAMILY. I JUST CAN’T SING PROPERLY in front of my teacher and it pisses me off! I don’t know if I’m intimidated or afraid of singing in front or someone. This makes me feel insecure about my voice! And the fact that my voice cracks and sounds like a ghost screaming in a horror movie is demotivating and adds to my insecurity. I honestly felt ashamed of my voice after today’s class. My teacher gives advice and stuff and I try following it, it works when I’m by myself practicing, but then when in front of her, I start shaking, my voice cracks and what not. My mom also advised me to sing without overthinking about what everyone thinks about my voice BUT. IT. DOESN’T. FXCKING. WORK. Trust me, I’ve tried it many times and I’m like “Ugh, what’s wrong with you!”
Ahem- anyway, feel free to make fun of me or something… I don’t care (but I do)
