I think is the one thing most people hate doing, especially if they still care about the other person’s feelings. So, here’s a bunch of tips from someone with two exes lmao. (basically I have no experience but imma say a bunch anyway)
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Do it in person if safe/possible to do so. This is more respect than anything. There’s nothing as dismissive as being told that your relationship is over through text. It’s hard to get closure, because no emotions were shared. As well as that, things over text can be very much open to interpretation at times, meaning your break up may not hold as much weight, and a desperate partner could use that against you
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Explain your reasons, but don’t say too much. What I mean by this is; if you’re breaking up with someone because of something they’ve done/failed to do, ect., then it’s best to explain that to them, so that they can learn from it if nothing else. However, if you’re breaking up with someone because you’ve fallen for someone else, or you just don’t like them anymore, it’s better to keep the details brief. Don’t mention the other person except to acknowledge that there is one. No names. You don’t know if your ex knows that other partner, and telling them could unfairly damage their relationship with that person.
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Be gentle. Unless your partner is an @sshole who doesn’t deserve sensitivity, try to be gentle. This is a huge shock for them, and they are going to need time to process, as well as grieve the lost relationship (if it has gone on for a while)
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Don’t procrasinate. There’s nothing worse than being led on for months while your partner works up the courage to tell you that you need to break up.
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Don’t expect to be friends, but don’t expect to be enemies either. Some people come out of relationships being besties with their ex. However, that isn’t always the case, and expecting it to be will only lead to disappointment. Now that you are no longer in a relationship, all ties, bar history, are cut. Neither of you owe the other anything. You are not responsible for them. That being said, avoid cold shouldering them unless you truly dislike or hate them now. That can just lead to drama, anger and frustration, as I’ve seen with one of my irl friend’s recent breakups.
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Don’t drag it out, or make it a huge deal. What I mean by this is: don’t invite them to a super fancy restaurant just to tell them you’re breaking up. It makes it hard for the ex to leave if they feel they need to, and can add a whole bunch of pressure and broken expectations on top of that. Like I said before, your ex will want to process it, and dragging the process on for an hour will only make that harder. As soon as you announce the news, they will want to escape the situation. My advice is to let them, as long as they understand that your relationship is over, and you are sure they don’t wish further explanations
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Make sure you actually talk to them. Don’t do that thing in movies where they just post up ‘Single’ on their status and expect the partner to get the hint. Don’t cheat on them either, that’s just rude. Talk to them, face to face is possible, and make sure they understand what’s happening, and get some closure.
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Don’t beat yourself up over it. Seriously, don’t. If breaking up with them was the only option, then it was the best option. Go get some ice cream or chocolate and allow yourself to feel disappointed. Then move on. You’ll find someone else.
Alrighty, that’s what I’ve got.
@Discussions - Feel free to add your own points and opinions below!