“Tell me Edward, what happened?”
“I just wanted to understand what the situation was between us…”
Flashback
That night kept getting farther from anything Eddie would have expected. He had ended up in the backseat of his own car, with the man who was apparently Paige’s father in the front passenger seat. That was a whole different story that Eddie was entirely out of the loop on. Despite his asking, Paige not only refused to give him the keys, but told them both to get out of the car. Its Eddie’s car, he has the right to be there. She can’t just drive off in his car and leave him behind.
Though… it turns out that staying in the car was a bad decision. Paige’s attention seemed focused on the situation with her father, but all Eddie could focus soon enough was the speed of the car. She ran the light, and only drove faster. 10… 20… 50…80… far past the speed limit and there was no sign she planned on slowing down. He begged for her to slow down, but his pleas went nowhere.
How long had they been in the car now? It had been a really long time. At least, it felt like it. His heart pounded in his chest, beating faster and faster, like the car. Each breath felt more difficult than the last, yet he was hyperventilating. Eddie could see how much he was shaking, he knew the feeling far too well. He was used to panic attacks, but this one felt worse, but perhaps that was just the anxiety talking. At this rate it seemed like they were going to die. That’s what was going to happen. They would crash, and maybe it wouldn’t be the crash that would kill him, it would be his own heart giving out. A heart attack killing him instead of the crash. It seemed likely. Or worse, it wouldn’t kill him, it would leave him alive but with grave injuries.
He could vaguely hear the voice of the man, Paige’s father, telling him to take a deep breath, but he wasn’t sure. All he was certain of was the pain in his chest. No, not a heart attack. He knew that, it was just him panicking. He was fine… he knew he was, it was normal, but that didn’t make anything better. The car came to a sudden stop, turning, and everything was silent. Paige got out of the car, saying something to him, that he could have his car back, but he couldn’t make out the words.
For a moment, he sat there, trying to breathe. He couldn’t be in that car. He needed air. He couldn’t breathe. He opened the door, and practically ran out of the car, practically collapsing in the grass at the side of the road. Breathe. That’s what he needed to do. Why was breathing so impossible? All he needed to do was take a deep breath, it was simple. He tried taking a deep breath, but only felt more nauseous. It wasn’t getting any better.
Paige’s father came over towards him, saying something, but Eddie couldn’t tell what. He knew the man was trying to check on him, to help, perhaps reminding him to breathe, or telling him that he would be fine and it would be over soon. It wasn’t helping. Eddie could only try to tell the man he didn’t need anything, that he could go after Paige. Whatever words Eddie manage to squeak out must’ve been enough, because the man left him to go find Paige, leaving Eddie completely alone.
Had it only been a few minutes? It didn’t feel like it. He felt sick, the nausea was overwhelming. It was like he was choking on air, if he was even taking any in. He fumbled with his phone taking it out of his pocket. He was shaking, and that made it harder to call his sister. He knew he couldn’t drive, he wasn’t okay.
End of Flashback
Eddie pulled on a rubber band that was around his wrist, letting it snap against his skin. He couldn’t sit still. He hated talking about his anxiety and panic attacks. Sitting with the therapist he only felt more anxious, but he needed the help. Things had gotten too bad again for him to not go to therapy.
“My sister and her husband came and got me to take me back home. I was out of it for s while… it… it was a bad one…”
“Have you talked to Paige since then?”
“No… I couldn’t… I don’t really know how to talk to her… I just… I’m missing so much…”
“Is there someone aside from her that you can ask about your relationship when you were younger?”
“Not… not really… my family won’t talk to me about it… much from when we were in London at all really…” Talking too much about his childhood in London often made things worse. Anxiety, insomnia, panic attacks… so much worse. Everything had finally settled where the anxiety wasn’t as bad, he was sleeping at night, all until Paige was back in his life, until he found out that they knew each other as kids.
“Are you sure there’s no one you can talk to about it?”
“I….” he paused. He wasn’t sure. The past was something that didn’t get brought up when he was around, and every time he only got partial answers or a sugar coated response, but maybe there was a way he could get answers.
Try and get the answers. That’s what Eddie said he would do. He would try, and maybe this was how he could. This wasn’t just talking about the past, this was about Paige and how he knew her. There was one option better than any other for where to go. Where else could he find someone who knew Paige her entire life, and someone who knew him his entire life?
He walked in the room, seeing his older sister, grinning, clearly unable to stop smiling now that there wasn’t an entire ocean between her and Emmy. Piper had barely been back from Paris for a couple of days, and it seemed wrong to interrupt the pair, but Eddie needed to talk to them both. “Sorry I’m interrupting…” he started, for a moment ready to back out and give up, but he needed the answers. “Paige is your sister, right Emmy? I know we were friends when we were kids, but… how close were we? How did we really know each other?”
