everyone is joining this war-
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I am impressed with your abilities. Would you be interested in joining my superior army against the neverending war between me and ebee? All I ask for is a casserole recipe.
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I am so proud of my sons rn
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Which side would I join? I am the spice master. I cultivate my own pepper fields by hand. My biceps have reached the same figure as a chili pepper. Which side is spicier? Which has more flavor? Which side is fit for the spice master?
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Whichever the spice tells you to join. Follow its guidance.
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I am the master of souls…I see the dead and can channel their power.
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But can you master the art of copypasta battles?
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Who knows…
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You see, I was on board with this argument until casserole was mentioned. Casserole? Casserole?! I was under the impression that you three, too, consumed the magically delicious, nutritious, finger-licking good, food labyrinth that is the indulgence of cannibalistic tendencies… ONLY to find out I have been DECIEVED and hear you lot talk about your flimsy sad excuses for casserole. I was under the impression that we were having Larry, Barbara, Joshua, Danny and those two annoying little kids for dinner… only to hear news of this sad excuse of casserole? Which is so pretentious by the way; CASSEROLE IS LASAGNA. There is no difference, you illiterate lower life forms. Now, as a true intellectual that will happily advertise the semantics of eating children, I shall take my leave as I prepare my feast with my PERFECTLY seasoned potato salad. Also, I heard word from Danny… your casserole is BURNT, Ceyrl.
Regards,
Cletus the Fetus
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Incorrect answer, Tabitha. I don’t want indecisive warriors on my side. I want an army that can write decisive threats, even if they make no sense.
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Damn you, Karen
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same-
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what you didn’t know is that we cooked those two annoying children, Cletus the Fetus.
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But you spared Danny and Barbara, didn’t you? That is unacceptable. They insulted my potato salad the other day.
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Don’t just assume like that Cletus. How do you know I didn’t cook and eat them? Did I mention they left the house? Please reconsider your threats before assuming I’m not a cannibal
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Casserole is for weaklings. I am the master of spice. There is no spice. Casserole is a little childs dish. There must be spice. There must be flavor. There must be life. There is NO LIFE inside of this casserole. Children are no good. Did you even THINK of adding spice? Even a LITTLE bit of pepper? PEPPER, the weak mans spice. You have no taste in good food. Your opinion is nothing against my spice farm. Each farmer is me. I am the flavor master. There is nothing here in this casserole. Such a SAD and PATHETIC meal you have created. Potato salad? Weak. If you were a true intellectual you would appeal to all spectrums of the spice world and just add some freaking GHOST PEPPER. Horrible, just horrible. I am the master of spice. Casserole is for weaklings.
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I’m sorry Greta, but you’re very much mistaken. I don’t want to have to say this, but you’re largely discriminating against other flavors. Spice isn’t the only flavor that should be worshipped and you should respect that. What about sweet? Salty? Or my absolute favorite, sour? You have no place in my army if you’re going to discriminate other flavors like that. Spice is good, but don’t worship it to the point where the other flavors feel excluded. My meals might be sad and pathetic because I’m no cook, but don’t put down the other meals.
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Are you assuming that I assumed that you’re not a cannibal right now? Honestly, I find that quite offensive. I was only trying to give you the benefit of the doubt that you would have the class to not eat CASSEROLE as a side for the main dish that is Danny and Barbara… wait a minute… are you trying to say that Danny is a snack? Oh, I see how it is. You think that I’m such a “boomer” that I don’t know what that means, but I know you’re trying to be hip with the kids and flirt with Danny when you KNOW we’ve been married for the past 15 years. I’ll have you know that I am the president of several planets that I will have NO PROBLEM sending into this stratosphere faster than you can snap those flimsy twigs you call fingers for a weak “thanos snap” counter and wipe you and your feeble countries off the face of this miserable planet. You could have just walked away, but noooooo; you brought this upon yourself, ver de terre. Skilled in battle? Pah-lease. I am a black belt in every fighting style known to man, even styles that don’t use that system, which you can proudly see from that belt I bought from the holy ground you mortals call Walmart. 69 war crimes today? Try 420, maggot. I suggest you follow the advice you gave Ceyrl and make like a fish with both eyes open when you sleep, or face the consequences.
With love,
Cletus the Fetus
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There is no diversity in flavor. There is only bland. Bland casserole, bland potato salad, bland water. There is no sugar, there is no salt, there is no spice. I am the flavor master. Not just the spice master. There should not be hate against the other flavors. The largest insult ever is bland. Bland, bland, bland. That is a crime. It is not challenging to add some oregano, parsley, or basil to a dish to add flavor. It is not challenging to cook, it is challenging to admit your fault. I am sad to say that the dish is bland. There is only bland. There is no diversity in flavor.
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Pepper?! PEPPER?! You mean the death penalty? Never have I EVER thought of even touching a morsel of pepper within a ten mile radius. Not to say that I don’t like spiciness or flavor, no, no, no. I add a pinch of salt to all my dishes for a splash of spice and spiciness in my life. Why, I was practically burning up by one molecule. The fact that you have mentioned pepper is a DEATH THREAT on my LIFE and my lawyers WILL be in contact IMMEDIATELY!
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