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Writing Desk Archive
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Anna is meeting Eli’s parents for the first time and they’re dating, and Eli’s parents are overprotective because Eli was abused by her ex. Anna ends up having a… outburst because Eli’s dad starts yelling out of nowhere and it triggers Anna

Anna: Hey!
Eli: Let’s go.
Anna: Okay.
They leave
(Eli’s house)
Mrs. Abe: So Anna…
Anna: Yes?
Mrs. Abe: How long have you known Eli?
Anna: almost a year
Mrs Abe whisper something to Mr Abe
Mr Abe: so what’s your religion
Anna: Religion?
Anna: I wouldn’t know, I was never taught about religion.
Mr Abe: hmm
Mrs Abe: do you have any past relationships
Anna: Yes, unfortunately.
Mrs Abe: oh
Mr Abe: Do you have a temper?
Eli: Dad…
Anna: I see where this is going.
Anna: Look Mr. Abe…
Anna: I’m not going to abuse Eli.
Anna: I’m not like that.
Anna: Because…
Anna goes silent
Mrs Abe: looks at anna
Mrs Abe: have you ever cheated on someone
Anna:…
Anna: umm
Anna: Look I love Eli.
Anna: With all my heart.
Anna: You have nothing to worry about.
Anna: I know Eli must have gone through something bad for you to be asking me this…
Anna: But I’ve went through hell.
Mr. Abe: Meaning?
Anna stands up and goes to a window and stares out of it
Anna: 6 years…
Eli’s parents whisper to each other
Mrs. Abe: 6 years of what?
Anna: 6 years of non-stop abuse…
Anna: Including being used as a human punching bag.
Mr Abe:Hmm
Anna: By my own stepmother.
Anna: Every year that went by…
Anna: I lost even more hope.
Quinn: Wow.
Anna looks back at Eli and her family
Anna: After going through that, I couldn’t abuse anyone.
Anna: Like my birth mom always said…
Anna: Violence is never the answer.
Anna: And even that wasn’t the lowest blow…
Jay: Hm?
Anna tenses up
Eli: its ok anna
Eli: you don’t have to say anything more
Eli:MäM(mom) please
Quinn nods
Quinn: That’s r-
Jay: What exactly was the lowest blow for you, Anna?
Eli: DAD!
Anna relaxes her body a bit
Anna: About a year ago I was hanging out with a friend, when my dad came up and blamed me for my birth mother’s suicide.
Quinn: I’m so sorry.
Anna: It’s fine, that’s just the lowest blow in my life.
Jay: Didn’t you have a boyfriend just the other day?
Anna: Yes…
Anna: But he dumped me the second I told him I was Bi. And my foster mom disowned me because of the same reason.
Jay:you got into a relationship right after you got dumped
Jay:So Eli is your back up or rebound!
Anna: No!
Anna: I love Eli!
Anna: Unlike Derek Johnson, I don’t do rebounds. I had feelings for her BEFORE he dumped me!
Jay: So while you where in a relationship
Jay: you have feelings for someone else!
Anna: Shut up! Shut up!
Tears emerge in Anna’s eyes as she drops to the floor
Anna: Just shut up!
Eli: Anna!
Eli runs to Anna and hugs her
Eli: Shh… it’s okay. I’m here.

@Writers

2

Moved to help and advice
Added tags

1 Like
3

This is very unrealistic, who would share this?
I mean, you wouldn’t want to tell a lady you JUST MET you got abused, it’s also a little cliche.

3 Likes
4

That’s part of her reasoning, to NEVER put her hands on anyone violently UNLESS it’s self defense. They’e basically interrogating her after all. And Mrs. Abe/Quinn IS her girlfriend’s mom. Not getting defensive or anything, just saying. And this isn’t the VERY first meeting. This is the first meeting as Eli’s girlfriend, Eli and Anna have been friends for a while. So she’s met these two before.

@SilverKittrn

5

I think that since this is a hard topic for someone to talk about, maybe you should add more signs that this has given her trauma Like deep breaths, sounding like she might tear up, spacing out, hands shaking, etc.

3 Likes
6

It’s very unrealistic that she is so casual

1 Like
7

Okay… I’ll try it

@anon93806337

She’s not, she has her back to them, because she doesn’t like being seen as weak

@celestialkitten

1 Like
8

Why would she ask? Wouldn’t she know, because of the topic they are talking about?

3 Likes
9

She didn’t ask straight up if Anna would abuse Eli, and all Anna said before that is she went through hell

@SilverKittrn

10

This is what I’m talking about @Allie. She is relaxed??

1 Like
11

She relaxed per BODY, she herself is NOT relaxed. She relaxed the MUCELS that were TENSE

12

Why would she go onto that topic though? It seems like she is spilling her life story to them.

2 Likes
14

Why would she tell him?!

15

She’s respectful and doesn’t talk back a lot. She’s trying to get him to understand she’s not gonna abuse Eli. She’s talking to her girlfriend’s parents for talking out loud.

16

Yes, but she doesn’t have to talk about that.

And I’m giving you some!

1 Like
17

She was yelled at all the time as a child, so she’s scared of not answering peoples questions, and being yelled at over stupid things.

And the way there’s a question mark & exclamation mark just makes it sound like your judging. Most people just leave it at a question mark.

@celestialkitten

18

Yes, but, Eli said that she didn’t have to continue, she could’ve left

1 Like
19

These are her girlfriend’s parents, she didn’t wanna just walk out and risk they’re relationship. Eli’s parent’s are overprotective because of Eli’s ex.

20

Why would she say this though?

2 Likes
21

Because it’s true. Are you just gonna nitpick EVERY SINGLE piece of dialogue in this scene?!