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[benitz786]

@novella

＊✿❀ Annie after senior year (Part 1) ❀✿＊

OKAY i’ve been meaning to do this

@novella

TW: grief

You need to capitalize and UNDERLINE my love

@novella

What am I supposed to do, if there’s no you? — Soon You’ll Get Better by Taylor Swift

Fck that hit me

@novella

The way Annie’s life looked right now, calling it ‘living’ would be an insult to the word itself.

No because this line

10000/10

holy fck

my poor baby

@novella

Weeks crept into months and she had retreated entirely to her bed.

@novella

Her days had blurred together into long, dark and empty periods of time that had no purpose and seemingly no end. Even tears couldn’t grant her some relief, as they soon ran dry. T

My baby

@novella

It had swallowed her whole, leaving only a shell of her former self who was deprived of every ounce of energy and feeling.

ANNIE

@novella

Justin and Kyra had checked in, though usually their own grief would unintentionally enable her further.

They are her siblings through and through

@novella

Her father had been persistent, with his words of love and encouragement from the funeral and after that.

HES TRYING

@novella

But all that came through was a reminder of her biggest mistake, the pain she had caused him and an inability to forgive herself for that.

Stop he’s forgiven you

you’re his baby girl

@novella

Annie had been a disappointment, and he was the prime example of that. So she listened to his attempts to get through to her, with a forced smile and a surface-level acknowledgement of them.

@novella

, her phone dead and neglected, collecting dust under her bed.

OPEN IT

ricky’s called… a few times…

@novella

The world outside her door had become a foreign and distant concept. Time had stood completely still, and she couldn’t see a way out. The tunnel she fallen into was suffocatingly dark, with no sign of a light at the end, and there wasn’t anything she was going to do to change that.

Okay also this

10000000000/10

holy fck the writer you are

@novella

“Well, this is a sight for sore eyes,” A voice pierced through the silence that the room had become accustomed to. The tone was assertive, bordering on judging

that’s paige for you

@novella

“Oh, no, no, we’re not doing that,”

GO OFF
love you paige

@novella

“Annie, when was the last time you ate?” She asked, her expression resembling something of concern for a moment.

no fr

@novella

r a moment. Until she stood still for a moment and truly inhaled. “Or… showered?”

@novella

“What day is it?” Annie finally asked, her throat dry and scratchy. “Thursday,” Paige answered without missing a beat, their exchange stalling once again awaiting the barely-responsive Annie. “Actually that doesn’t help,” She mumbled through a sigh.

I can literally imagine this scene playing out

paige’s annoyed looks

annie’s pure depression

@novella

er, “Come on,” She huffed, taking Annie by the shoulders and pulled her to sitting up. “What are you…-” She started, but her words faltered. Before she even had a moment to process, and protest, Annie was hauled up onto her feet by Paige with unexpected determination. “You’re showering. Now. Then getting out of here,” Paige insisted, pushing her out towards the bathroom. This was a lot of sudden movement for Annie’s liking, leaving her blinking in confusing and holding onto her doorframe to steady herself. “Alright,” She muttered, her voice coarse with misuse,

Love how paige can pull her out of this

@novella

She pulled off the hoodie and sweatpants that had basically become a part of her for the last few weeks before stepping under the stream, allowing herself to become immersed in the water. S

those need to be burned

@novella

n it was as if Paige could see what she was doing, because as soon as Annie went to reach for her worn in hoodie, a sharp knock at the door interrupted her. “You better not be putting back on those biohazards you’re mistaking for clothes,” Paige warned her, causing Annie to freeze mid-motion

PERIOD

ew

@novella

Open the door a little,” She was instructed, and Annie listened, unlocking and letting the door swing towards her slightly. Then the opening increased, to make room for the folded pile of clothes P

I love paige’s sisterly love here

@novella

They were clean, the sweater that was actually once her favourite was now tainted with the faint scent of detergent, and lacking in the worn-in comfort from her tattered hoodie that she had clung to for weeks. But her unease regarding her clothing soon took a new form when her gaze landed on the bathroom mirror. Staring back at her was someone she hardly recognise

my love

@novella

Eventually, Annie found her way back to Paige. “There you are,” She said upon Annie’s entrance, with a softened tone that was unusual for Paige.

well yeah

even paige has a heart

@novella

pace. “That’s not happening,” Annie declared, definitively before going to lie back down. “You go, tell me all about them. Or something.”

you think paige is not gonna drag your ass?

@novella

“… Annie?” She was suddenly able to single out Paige’s voice amongst the many. It was firm but still patient, and sufficed in drawing her back to the present, turning to her expectant face. “What?” Annie responded, her voice distant. “I was asking you what you wanted,” She explained. The words were slow to process, but then the pressuring eyes of the barista came into focus for Annie, her mind eventually caught up with the situation. The question was simple, and finding it difficult it made her feel even more out of place. “Oh. Nothing, thanks,” She answered, shifting in unease. “I could have guessed,” P

SIGH PICK SOMETHING YOU’RE A SKINNY STICK NOW

YOU NEED FOOD

@novella

“Your mom would hate this,” Broke the silence, it’s unexpectedness jolting Annie and drawing her attention. Everyone had danced around that subject, and so for it to suddenly be an opening line was unsettling. “Giving up and hiding away. This isn’t what she wanted,”

she really would

@novella

“What did she say in her last speech, at that award show?” She asked, though not anticipating an actual answer from Annie. Not that Annie would have known the answer, as she never revisited that speech after Sadie had died. “‘With ends come new beginnings’, she believed in turning the page. Because there are so many pages and entire chapters left for you, if you would just get that book out from under the bed,” Paige paused for a moment, leaving Annie to process this.

She left that message for annie

@novella

. “You need to try, Annie,” She continued, “Sadie may not be here, and I am… I’m so sorry for that, but the least you can do is try to honour her wishes. She wanted more for you. If not for you, do it for your dad, Justin, Kyra. For your mom,”

They all need her in their lives

@novella

e. “How… how do I do that?” Her throat had tightened, so Annie’s words came out a whisper, but was enough to break the silence. The gap between where she was and where she needed to be had felt insuperable, and every day that passed she was pushing herself further and further away. “It’s not gonna come overnight, you don’t have to rush or ignore the pain. But if you can just do something, even once a day, to try and move forward. To get up, to open your windows, to look after yourself a bit more,” Paige’s gaze softened, and it was look Annie hadn’t seen on her face before. “There are still people here who love you and want to see you living again, and they’ll be here for you. I’ll be here for you.”

Urgh so cute

@novella

she pushed herself to open her laptop and watch the speech that Paige had referred to.

@novella

She was confronted with her mother’s face; her smile, her warmth and the joy in her eyes that Annie had been deprived from. The tears came almost instantly as Sadie spoke of finding light in the darkest of times. Annie let herself cry, and feel the grief she had been shutting down for weeks in all its intensity. It didn’t make it go away, not even slightly. But it was a start.

Oh sadie

my baby

@novella

@benitz786 I hope I did Paige okay

You did perfect

urgh

sister love