<<Trouble in mayday>> Official Roleplay thread

[Kristi]

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When Hazel asked if she was ok, Alissa smiled at her, “Sorry for not telling you” was what Alissa said not, ‘yes i’m ok’ or no i’m not. Just Sorry for not telling you because really Alissa was sorry for not telling Hazel that Dior and her had always been more than friends- well not always, there were friends first during first quarter of freshmen year till their relationship grew. Alissa was truly in love with Dior- so in love that she was willing to sacrifice a lot for her and yet she could not tell Hazel that. She could have at least hinted to Hazel she was seeing someone or that she was questioning her sexuality but Alissa was terrified, after all it was 2001, and Alissa was supposed to be the school’s little miss perfect- straight everything even straight sexuality and though Alissa knew Hazel would not judge or be like those straight girls who would be like 'why are you telling me? do you have a crush on me ew" and then get mad when you said no, but Alissa was not ready to tell anyone till Dior was, “Are you ok?” Alissa threw the question back at Hazel, putting her head on the girl’s shoulders. She was glad to have Hazel as a friend, even if Hazel did not know how glad she was to have that.

Especially since that rumor of Hazel was posted, and Hazel had thought it was her but had forgave her- even though Dior had suggested she posted that rumor of Hazel, which was not completely false, Alissa did not want to do it, so she didn’t and Dior did not ask again, though it turned out that a little bug was listening to Alissa and dior conversation as they posted that and Alissa had have them removed from the newspaper commite- on the guidance that they did consult her, the president before posting that. When hazel had asked if she did it and why she did it though, Alissa had taken the blame, why? She doesn’t know why but she just did and apologized to something she had no knowledge off and she was shocked to see how easily Hazel had forgiven her. When Hazel had forgiven her, Alissa would admit she was a little angry with her because why? How could you forgive so easily Haze? Especially in this school, Alissa will not always be there to help Hazel and Hazel needed a backbone,

“You’re way to kind, Nut.” Alissa said, calling hazel her nickname- nut, Hazelnut. Hazel was truly like a nut. She turned her attention to Anthony, asking him questions about his brother and she noticed his heart sink at her questions, she felt bad for asking really, “He wouldn’t just run away?” Then it probably had to be a fight with his family or he had committed aa crime but Alissa did not want to suggest the other part, in case he got defensive or she hurt him, “I’m sure there’s a reason why he left Anthony, he probably didn’t want to leave you but he had to, he will be back.” Alissa was not the best with comforting people so she turned to Hazel for a bit for help, before she continued, “It’s not optimism but faith and hope- which sure I guess it’s optimism,” She let out a nervous chuckle, “But he will be back soon and you did your best to find him on your own but Anthony you’re not a professional, the police and the detectives are, i’m sure they will track him down and you can ask him the questions you want to ask him”

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@eunoia - anthony
@Mouschi - hazel

[Kristi]

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Jacob just gave him a weak smile, he was still processing everything- Alissa admitting to hating him too, feeling jealous of him, her dating his ex who is also not quite his ex. Reece liking one of Alissa’s friends he wondered who, his teacher dying, the prep’s brother going missing, possible dead which is also suspicious, and what else did he miss? Everything was just too much, “I never expected this to happen like sht maybe i should have skipped detention,” He muttered, "Going to rain check on the hug rn but I might need it someday if that’s cool with you?’ He continued.

Jacob was a lot of things but he was not like this macho macho men who thought it was gay to hug a friend, like what happened to brotherhood? You don’t hug your dads nor brothers? Right, Jacob remembered, a lot of people this days are fatherless, but anyways Jacob was not like those people. If he needed a hug, he would allow a hug but when he’s comfortable, sometimes he can get put off by physical contact, other times he loved it- see that was what was wrong with Jacob, his feelings and expressions were never constant, and this was why he did not do relationships nor situationships much. He liked to be with friends, maybe some friends with benefits were he knows things would not be constant but he did not like to date around or date at all, he was scared to hurt people because see, Jacob would be an awful partner. He would not cheat- Gosh no, he was raised better than to be a cheater but you just never knew which Jacob to expect. Kind caring and always cracking jokes, or a bit of nonchalant @sshole who wants to be left alone. That was why he could not do it with Hazel, why he had to ditch her, he knew if she liked him back truly, he would break her hearts to a thousand pieces and he could not live with that.

Fck, Jacob was probably never going to marry as well. “Shxt just crazy, like I can’t believe all this is happening. I thought the craziest moments of my life will be in my 20s, you know college not in fcking high school.” he sighed, “All those times I prayed on Mr.Albert to die, I was only joking because of the homework he gave us, I never really wanted the old man to die- or at least not like this,” He said shuddering as he remembered the look on Mr.Albert’s face while he was on the ground.

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@LunaticLeviTheSecond

[LunaticLeviTheSecond]

Reece smiled. “Listen man, Hugging is one type of physical contanct I do the least of right after hand holding. But I can’t deny that a good hug can be the most comforting thing when things go wrong. So from now on, if you need that comfort, you can just imagine me holding a ‘Free hugs’ sign. I didn’t do it in a while but, according to some I give great hugs.”

Reece was staring at Mr. Albert’s empty chair, wondering what happened. He didn’t try to make sense of it becuase that involves imagining one of the kids with him a killer, and he just couldn’t accept that as a fact. He, like some people in the room would wish for somebody’s death, but now he’s dead Reece wants him back. He didn’t want this to be their reality. This event might prove the world is a f*cked up place and … What if he never makes it? What if his plan of moving out from his stepfather never happens and he’ll be stuck there. What if he breaks something and loses his scholarship and he’ll fail everything?

Jacob spoke again, which made Reece stop thinking this way. “Hey, J-man, don’t fret it. We’ve all disliked this particular teacher. We all wanted him dead at one point or another. Hell, some of us even told it to his face, or muttered it under our breath. Some of us wished he was dead 5 minutes before his untimely death. But that doesn’t mean any of us should feel this is our fault. Until you actually wedge that knife into him, you did nothing wrong, and you’re still the perfect little Jacob I’ve known since you were on the team. Okay? You should’t feel guilty for disliking a sadistic teacher who gave out homework as if he was punishing us all.”

@Kristi

[Mouschi]

Alissa insisted that she was feeling alright, even though it was a lie that hid behind reassurance. After all, many things conflicted with her persistence, like the expressions of pain visible on her face while her hand is over her stomach. Hazel had been watching her attentively all this time and finally, Alissa’s precariousness prompted her to question if she was being truthful. Was she really ok? Her frequent attempts at retching were obvious to those around her. Hazel knew she shouldn’t force the truth, instead she kept Alissa in her sight, worried for her.

It wasn’t long before Alissa’s guilt motivated her to apologize and change the subject, “Sorry for not telling you”, she said. In immediate response, Hazel smiled at her dismissively while shaking her head, “I get it, it’s a difficult thing to do”. Hazel tapped her fingers on the plastic and feared for her revelation. Her heartbeat faltered and she was met with the bitter truth.

“You’re way to kind, Nut."

Hazel smiled slightly and responded “I know, I know”. She couldn’t help but feel sad yet happy, Jacob had told her the same thing, and that’s the impression she wanted. Would she be remembered as being kind?

@Kristi

[Kristi]

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“We gotta see bout that then,” Jacob said with a small chuckle as Reece said he gave the best hugs. He was glad to have some comfort in this tough situation he was going through, his life has always been confusing but not fcked up but right now, Jacob felt another level of fcked and he wanted to disappear from the world for a while, but then what would happen to the ones he cared about? Jacob was also not a good cook so if he ran away, he will be starving or living off burnt foods so that’s what kept him from going away and starting a new life. He was also pretty sure that Alissa would not agree to move away as well and even when they grow up and go to college, Jacob always planned on staying near his twin. She was his twin after all, family stuck together and being twins, being born on the exact same day, some minutes apart- Alissa technically being the oldest meant that they were more than siblings, they were like soulmates but not in the romantic sense- gross, but in a familial platonic ish sense, after all they have always been together from birth quite literally.

Together in the womb, together growing up, same school, bathed together till they were 10, same clique and now dated the same person. Jacob could not imagine a life without Alissa, even if Alissa could be annoying sometimes and he hated her just a little bit, he will always love the chick. Just wish that people would not associate them together all the time- Jacob was way more than Alissa’s twin brother, or the other twin. He was Jacob, and constantly being reminded of his twinship with Alissa was quite annoying and did make him wish he was not a twin at times. “Oh no, don’t misunderstand I don’t feel guilty for disliking the @sshole- rip to Mr.Albert, just wished he was not murdered in cold blood you know. Especially in the school, because it quite literally can be any of the staff who murdered him and being here right now with no phones bro, we might be the next ones.” Hopefully the murder follows the rules of the game and murders whoever is a v!rgin among st them because virgins are always the first to d!e, it was a tale as old as time, “At least we don’t have to complete that essay Mr.Albert assigned us now,” Jacob said trying to lighten up the mood, “Hopefully the principal has mercy on us and let us ‘grieve’” He did air quotations around the word grieve, “And give us free A’s for the essay overall.” He mummbled.

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@LunaticLeviTheSecond

[eunoia]

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Jenny couldn’t help but stare at Willow’s gothic look. Her dark black lips and pale white makeup stood out in stark contrast to the other students’ more conventional appearance. Jenny had always thought of Willow’s style as weird to say the least, but at that moment, she found it oddly fascinating. She watched as Willow sat quietly, observing the group but not speaking. Making a mental note to keep an eye on Willow, she thought maybe beneath the gothic exterior, Willow may have hidden depths. Despite her initial judgment of Willow’s style, she was starting to think it was pretty… cool. A thought she would keep to herself.

As secrets went on, Jenny found herself stealing glances at Willow, trying to figure her out. She was curious about what made her tick and why she chose to dress the way she did.

There was a slight still in the conversation, and Jenny took her chance, eyeing her classmate Weeping Willow who was seated not so far. Her mind was already working on how to get Willow to open up and spill her secrets. They just need a little… push. She thought, a gleam in her eye.

Willow, in her usual gothic attire, usually sat quietly with her nose buried in a book whenever J.B had noticed her. Jenny stared at her, like, stared , and I hoped it made her feel uneasy. This wasn’t just any random time she noticed the goth.

Jenny finally leaned in close to Willow and whispered, “Hey, why are you always so quiet? What’s your deal?” Her eyes roved over the other students, back to react of other secrets. Yawn.

Jenny scoffed and rolled her eyes. “Come on, you must have something juicy to share. Everyone else has already spilled their secrets.” Well, almost everyone. “Why not get that thing off your chest, look how much better Anti looks?” She made a big gesture of turning to look at him, though she wasn’t a fan herself.

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Orp ◆ @idiot.exe ◆ Willow

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[Kristi]

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Alissa hmm when Hazel said it was difficult to do, because truthfully it was, especially since her parents did not know yet. Her aunt knew, one of her aunts did, and that was because she had caught Alissa and Jennifer on the act and asked what was going on with them, they had both well confessed and the aunt had taken it ok- not well, not badly but ok. She had been really surprised and Alissa was too really when she discovered she had feelings for Jennifer and when she realized Jennifer had similar feelings. "Should have told you I was in a relationship at least, you’re one of my close friends."Alissa said, “Really, i’ll not keep any secrets from you anymore.” Well, the last parts was a lie and Alissa knew it well, but it was for her safety, Alissa could not tell her. “Let’s be more,” Not complete but more, “Honest with each other ok and I’m sorry Dior can be mean to you at times.” She does tell Dior off for that so there’s that.

Hazel tapped herfingers on her plastic and jolted when Alissa called her kind. Alissa saw that she wasalittlr bit sad but mostly happy so she blinked, “Hazel it’s anything the problem?”

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@Mouschi

[Mouschi]

The things Alissa said had deepened her guilt. Should they become more open with one another? In the end, perhaps Hazel was overreacting, and her secret was not such a big deal. Everytime she’d convince herself to tell the truth, something held her back. Eventually, she responded “You don’t have to apologize on behalf of Dior”.

It wasn’t long before Alissa had noticed the finger tapping and asked, “Hazel, is anything the problem?”.

With a moment to think, Hazel reminded herself that she was too much of an easy read. Her nervous fidgeting was a habit and the look of worry was smeared across her face. She knew that her “problem” was the truth, but was it denial too?

She glanced over at Reece and asked shyly, “How long has he felt like that?”. Even though it was a genuine question, it was also a cover. Hazel really did want to know, especially since the two have never spoken much or at all. Besides the uncertainty around spilling her secret, she had been thinking about that “crush” a lot. Alissa even said it was obsessive.

@Kristi
@LunaticLeviTheSecond

[Kristi]

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“I know,” Alissa smiled, “But Dior needs someone to take care of her, she’s very scared.” Alissa admitted and it was true. Dior was scared of a lot of things, middle school was hell for her and Dior had told her everyday and high school at first had been scary for her. Freshman year and sophomore year was rocky not because she got bullied, no no Dior had already established herself and she was Alissa’s best friend and the daughter to a famous hollywood director, She was Dior Olivia Greens, and Dior could not be bullied anymore but she was scared during those times because Dior still needed help figuring herself out navigating her relationship with Alissa, accepting her sexuality and helping Alissa solve something they were solving that could cause them all. Especially since Alissa had to do something, Dior was not fond of her doing, Dior had always been scared because she had always had to fight. She was a formerly black poor chubby girl turned bulimic black rich prep with a parent she could brag about. During sophomore year, Dior was still suffering severely from her disorder though she would not admit that, but Alissa knows that senior year Dior was doing better with the disorder and she made sure of it.

She also made sure that all her friends, all the people she really cared about were ok. Whether they were nerds, goths, stoners etc, Alissa made sure no one spoke to them in a bad way, bullied them, and before you go, ‘why doesn’t Alissa help the other kids getting bullied’ you will need to put your thinking caps on. Alissa was no second coming of Jesus, she could not help all the bullied kids and even if she talked about anti bullying, the bullying will continue because the world was filled with all kinds of people. It was easier to back up a friend because everyone knows to stay clear of Alissa friends, though most of her friends were already top of the social status so even if they were not Alissa friends they will be saved, and they could protect themselves.

So, anyways Alissa asked Hazel if she was ok because really Hazel looked like she got a lot on her mind, she blinked taking a step back when Hazel asked her how long had Reece felt that about Hazel because really Alissa did not know. Alissa knew that Reece liked Hazel because she had seen the glances he had thrown her way when he thought no one was looking and he had caught them once, and Alissa knows a lot that’s why her hair is so big! Dior would say, because it’s filled with secrets. “I don’t know,” Alissa admitted because really she didn’t, “A while I think. You can ask him,” Alissa said because though she disliked Reece, if Hazel liked him for god knows what reason- lack of good taste, she won’t stand in the way of the awful (Hazel is not awful tho!! just them as a couple in general) couple. “But really is that all in your mind?”

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@Mouschi
@LunaticLeviTheSecond

[idiot.exe]

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At first, Willow was curious about her classmates’ secrets. She had a strong urge to get to know them all, their deepest thoughts and feelings, even if she’s barely spoken to them. She sat on a desk somewhere in the middle, so she could be closer to the rest. They were stuck together, whether they liked it or not, so sharing secrets was essential. Willow knew that, and yet, she feared the moment her turn would come. She discreetly took her notebook out of her bag, continuing to write down her thoughts. But her attention wasn’t fully on the poem, rather, it alternated between writing and listening to the conversations around her.

But soon the relatively calm atmosphere grew tense. Unfortunately, it was a sight all too familiar to Willow. She tried to listen to both sides, to hear everyone’s reasoning, but after a while it got too heated for her. The yelling and bickering began to sound muffled, as a ringing noise sounded in Willow’s ears. In front of her were Alissa, Jacob and Reece, arguing about something she could barely understand anymore. She could see her hands gripping the pen firmly, as she scribbled in the margins of her notebook. She could see the desk she was resting her arms on, feel the ground beneath her feet. But no matter how much she tried to ground herself in reality, to remind herself she’s in school now, she kept hearing the voices of her parents.

Willow could tune out the noise of her surroundings, but her mother’s voice was louder than the ringing. She could hear the disappointment in her voice, the tone she was so familiar with. On the other end, she could hear her father, defending Willow and her future. And yet, he was the main cause of her distress. He was the one who always argued instead of giving up on Willow. She tightened her grip on the pen, pressing down so hard it ripped the page. Her other hand was shaking, as Willow struggled to hold back her tears. She shut her eyes tightly, accepting that the only thing she could do was wait.

She took a few deep breaths, slowly beginning to write in her notebook again. She could barely understand the words she was putting on paper, but she needed some kind of distraction. In a while, the room started to quiet down and the argument calmed down. Willow’s breathing finally slowed. She turned the page, deciding to write down everything she felt in that moment.

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As Willow was writing, she was suddenly interrupted by one of her classmates. She quickly shut her notebook. Her attention turned to the girl speaking to her, as she slowly pulled her notebook away. Willow had seen her before, though she has always been too intimidated to approach her. One of the rebels, nicknamed J.B.? Willow was never fond of giving people nicknames, they reduced the complexity of a human to a simple stereotype. A fragment of who the person really was. Yet, she could only remember most of the students by their nicknames.

“If you must know, it’s because I prefer to observe instead of speak.” she replied, smiling faintly. She put down her pen on the desk. “I don’t have many interesting secrets to share, I doubt I could hold your attention.”

When Jennifer mentioned Anthony, she turned to him to observe his expression. She couldn’t see him feeling relieved, rather distressed. The tone of his voice while speaking about his brother, his desperate attempts to find him again, nobody could feel happy being reminded of their hardships. It’s part of why Willow was anxious to share her secrets. She didn’t want to voice her true feelings about her troubles. Because if she ever spoke up, she wouldn’t be able to keep her composure. She’s had enough already that day and all she wanted was to go home. It was easier to keep everything buried deep inside, acknowledging their existence, yet doing nothing to fix it.

“What about you? Is there anything weighing on your mind? I would be here to listen to you, if you need anyone.” she spoke softly, attempting to change the subject.

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@Tina.G × Jennifer Avery Boyd

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[Mouschi]

Feelings of anxiousness soon crept over Hazel as she watched Jacob and Reece from across the room. Her mind was drifting away again, back to what Alissa had said in the heat of the moment. Alissa said that she liked Jacob, not Reece. But, was she right? And did Jacob still have feelings?

When Alissa nudged her to ask Reece, Hazel had to look away from them quickly. Turning back to Alissa, she said, “I don’t think that’s a good idea, wouldn’t that be a little weird?”. Even though Reece hadn’t admitted it to her directly, Hazel still felt unsure about bringing it up to him. There were simply too many what-ifs. What would she even say? Where would she start?

With one last thought, she continued fidgeting. When it came her turn to share, she already knew she’d freeze. For the longest time, Hazel thought that she could carry her secret to the grave. Sadly, the truth would change her life forever and people would change how they looked at her. That change was her fear.

“But really is that all in your mind?”

Hazel smiled and let out a soft chuckle, “Maybe?”. Desperately, Hazel wanted to be truthful with Alissa. It was obvious and she knew that she couldn’t hide from the truth forever. She wanted to say it, the words even rest at the tip of her tongue, but still nothing came out.

@Kristi
@LunaticLeviTheSecond

[Kristi]

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Alissa wondered what Hazel was thinking about, she seemed to be having a lot in her head especially since she looked over to see Jacob and the other one. Was it really that hard to talk to either them? Now Alissa obviously could not tell Hazel who to do date, Hazel was her friend not her slave, but if she’s thinking of which one then… actually Alissa is also confused along with Hazel on who would be the better pick. Jacob is her brother, but his personality was a little bit… and Alissa did not like the idea of Jacob dating her friends much, Reece was an @sshole, a jerk and not someone who really deserved Hazel but the fact he’s not related to her in any shape or form actually seemed really good wait…

hmm, “No, why would it be weird? Well, actually maybe talk to him later,” Alissa shrugged, “By the way what did you and jacob talk about earlier?” Alissa asked curiously, she was to busy focusing on her own convo with nate that she could not eavedropped on theirs, “Did he apologize?” Alissa asked an eyebrow raised, what ever was going on looked a little cheesy fun for apologizing, so she wanted to know if he did, especially since she was sure that Hazel and him have not talked much this past months.

“If you say so!” Alissa said in reference to Hazel saying maybe to if it that was the only thing in your mind, “But if you want to talk i’m here, you can always trust me.”

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@Mouschi

[eunoia]

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Anthony’s heart sank even further at Alissa’s words. He had already done everything he could to find his brother, but to hear someone suggest that his brother has just up and left without telling him, no explanation, no contact ever—hurt him deeply. He felt like he had failed his brother and his family.

He tried to keep his composure and not cause a scene, but the tears were welling up in his eyes. He managed to mutter a small thank you before smiling ‘fondly’ and excusing himself from the conversation. He found himself standing in front of the blackboard.

Once out of earshot, he let out a deep sigh and wiped away his tears. He knew Alissa meant well, but her words only added to his pain and frustration. He just wanted his brother back, and the thought of him being in trouble or not wanting to come back was too much for him to handle.

He took a few deep breaths and composed himself before rejoining the group. He didn’t want to ruin the mood and decided to focus on the positive things in his life for the rest of the night. And so on… back to secrets.

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@Kristi • Alissa • Just wanted to get this out, feel free to stay where u are with Hazel though

[eunoia]

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Jenny could see that Willow seemed a bit distracted, her attention divided between writing in her notebook and listening to the others speak. Don’t wanna forget any of these secrets, eh? J.B thought. As the conversation continued, Jenny noticed that Willow’s eyes kept darting around the room, as if she was looking for something or someone. Jenny couldn’t quite put her finger on what was bothering her about Willow’s behavior, but she knew that something was off.

“I don’t have many interesting secrets to share, I doubt I could hold your attention.” Jenny rolled her eyes and let out a scoff. “Oh, please. That’s just an excuse for being boring,” she said, not one to mince her words. “I bet you have plenty of interesting things to say, you’re just too scared to share them.”

Jenny paused for a moment, surprised by Willow’s question. She had always been so good at hiding her own emotions, never burdening others with her problems—Except accidentally drunken Jenny, or outburst Jenny with Fern. But not the point.

“Fine, if we wanna be like that.” A playful grin spread across her face as well as a mischievous gleam in her eyes. “I’ll say my secrets to the group if you tell yours. Unless you just wanna get it over with and be done with it all? Go first? Either way, it works with me.” Jenny said the last part in her most ‘I’m great with children, animals, and probably a Disney princess’ voice.

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Hope this is alright ^.^◆ @idiot.exe ◆ Willow

@Mouschi ◆ Hazel mentioned @Jass ◆ Fern Mentioned

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[Mouschi]

“By the way what did you and jacob talk about earlier?”

Hazel toyed with the bandage on her hand gently as she brought herself back. Caressing it lightly with her thumb, she remembered the time they shared earlier. A strange warmth had taken over her senses as she thought about the softness of his hands . . . and the quick hug she’d given him.

Hazel broke into a shy smile, “Yeah, he did apologize and I was really shocked”. She paused as her gaze shifted to him, “I wonder . . . why did he only apologize now?”. Returning her attention to Alissa, Hazel exchanged glances with her, hoping she’d have an answer. Still, Alissa was much more focused on the fact that something troubled Hazel.

Alissa had been reassuring Hazel after all and Alissa’s company made her feel safe enough to share. With one last ponder, she sighed deeply and gave in, “I trust you”.

In the very end, she knew she couldn’t run from it forever. And in a way, everyone deserved to know.

With her mind made up, she stood up from her seat slowly and drew attention to herself by clearing her throat. “I guess I’ll share something about me too”. As she spoke, her voice hitched from the fear and she sought to distract herself by looking away.

Without wasting any more time, she pushed on. “I’m dying”, Hazel admitted, defeated. With a second sigh, she gripped the sides of her shirt and lifted it over her head, a lengthy red scar stretched across her chest. While wiping away a tear from her cheek, she continued, “I’ve had heart problems since I was a child, and I needed surgery” . Heat spread across her face and she held her head down while pulling her shirt back on.

“I had a heart transplant freshman year . . . but there were complications and now they’re not sure . . . not sure how long I have left”.

@Kristi
@eunoia

[Kristi]

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Jacob froze, "i’ve had heart problems since I was a child, and I needed surgery… not sure how long I have left,’ Jacob did not know how to feel- ok that was a lie, Jacob had an idea on what to feel and it was nothing good. Hazel, his Hazel- ok hazel was not his but she was his friend, his dearest friend could possibly d!e any moment now and Jacob thought he was done with deaths for a while after Mr.Albert passed away from murder.

But of course, life could not be fair to him, life did not like the idea of Jacob being happy and all smiley faces it seemed- instead it had to find a way to punch him down. From his sister, his twin being with his not so ex, his teacher dying, being quite possibly in the room with the murder- Anthony or any of the staff, and now Hazel, the girl he never really got the chance to confess what he felt for possibly dying. Could his day just get any better? Really?

“Hazel…” Jacob started, sadness was written over his face, Hazel, the girl he knew since the first day of high school, the girl that had come to his house often to hang out with his sister, the girl that Jacob founded himself looking at a little too often, that same Hazel could seriously fcking die at any giving moment, “You won’t die,” He said, he did not know if he was trying to convince himself or Hazel- perhaps himself, “You can’t, you have so much to live for Hazel, and I-” He froze, he didn’t know what to say, he could only bite his lips as he turned to look at his sister for help on what to say. Alissa seemed frozen, she was shocked- it looked like this was one of the many thing Alissa also did not know, it seemed that today, Alissa did not know everything and Jacob wished she did because what else was he going to learn today, that he and Alissa were adopted and their real family are mafia lords?

Hopefully not, but everything seemed possible right now.

Jacob continued to stare at Hazel, he wanted to hug her really- but all he could do was stare. Jacob was not that fond of hugs, he would accept them sometime, but he would not typically give one and so his hands flickered wanting to give her a hug but he just… he could not. “Hazel,” He began again, he was calling her name a lot right now because it seemed that any second now he would not be able to say her name again, not directly to her at least. “I’ll be here for you, we all will,” He was not so sure about the ‘we’ but he was sure that he would be, “No matter what, because I- we really like you.”

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@Mouschi

[LunaticLeviTheSecond]

Reece nods “I know, none of us wanted mr. Alberts to die, except maybe one of us?” He said and sighed. “I just hope the staff doesn’t accuse us of anything.”
Reece chuckled. “I don’t think the principal would give us As. I mean if I walked in on one of my professors stabbed to death and found his detention class scared off in the little room doing pretty much nothing, I wouldn’t give them aces. Plus when it comes to detention work, it’s generally not graded it’s there only to waste your …” Reece wanted to finish that sentence when he was struck by Hazel’s announcement. When she said she had heart problems his almost stopped. ‘No, a sweet girl like her can’t be taken from the world so soon.’
He stood up and after Jacob responded to her he said. “Jacob is right, I’m pretty sure everybody in this room likes you.” He gulped before having the heart to ask the question that was on his mind. “What kind of heart problems are we talking about?” He wanted to know how serious it was. “Acute angina? Valve disease? Coronary artery disease?” He named the first three diseases that came to his mind … Maybe it’s the only three heart diseases he knows, but he wanted to show her he knows a bit about it coming from his family of a doctor and a pharmacist he always knew a bit more about what should be done.

@Kristi - Jacob
@Mouschi - Hazel

[eunoia]

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Jenny was shocked to hear Hazel’s confession, enough to turn from Willow for a second. She couldn’t believe that someone as young as Hazel could have heart problems. However, as usual, Jenny didn’t have much of a filter and immediately blurted out, “But if you have heart problems, why do you smoke?” Jen blurted between other big questions floating in the air by the others.

Jenny knew well that Hazel was a stoner and had seen her smoking in the past. She just couldn’t understand why someone with heart issues would smoke. Jenny’s question probably made the others in the group uncomfortable, and Jenny felt sorry for putting Hazel on the spot but she couldn’t help but be curious. Everyone was thinking it. It came out only maybe twenty years ago that smoking was bad for your health. Plus, she knew that smoking was not good for anyone, let alone someone with heart issues.

Jenny couldn’t help but wonder what had caused Hazel’s heart issues. Was it something genetic? Or maybe something she had done to her own body? Jenny knew that Hazel was a stoner and wondered if smoking had contributed to her heart problems.

Which is why she did not feel completely awkward asking Hazel why she smoked. She knew it was not her place to question her choices, especially in front of the others. But she couldn’t help cinder the truth about Hazel’s health.

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Orp ◆ @Mouschi • @idiot.exe ◆ Hazel • Willow Mentioned

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[Mouschi]

Confessing had only brought her anxiety, not peace. An immediate feeling of regret lingered over her as she studied the worried faces staring back at her. Jacob’s face especially caught her attention. His eyes bore into her with a look she’d never seen before. To say it was surprising was an understatement. But now that she’d confessed, Hazel knew the inevitable truth, She could not hide from it anymore.

Jacob was the first to speak out. He started off slow, and his words came almost unexpectedly. Her name rang out with uncertainty, like he was at a loss for words. “Hazel . . .”, he started. His voice was tainted with sorrow and worry, which only deepened her regret. Hearing her name like this felt surreal . . . and hurt like a knife had been stabbed through her chest. She could almost feel the weight on her shoulders multiply as her name rang out a second time. “Hazel . . .”. This time, he continued.

“I’ll be here for you, we all will”
“No matter what, because I- we really like you.”

Upon first thought, his words were touching. However, it seemed to be missing something, like he stopped himself mid thought. Hazel stared back at him, teary eyed and unable to move. So many thoughts raced through her already frazzled mind. She did not know how to respond.

“Thank you, Jacob. It means a lot to me”. Hazel exhaled loudly, yet little relief was felt. She still felt uncomfortable and unnerved all over. Still, Hazel wondered what Jacob was trying to say before he corrected himself.

Immediately after she responded, Reece stood up and agreed with Jacob. Now, Hazel was the one staring at Reece. She did want to talk about his crush, just not now. To put it simply, there was just too much for her to comprehend, too many things happening at once. And, when Reece asked her about her heart, she froze. “What kind of heart problems are we talking about?”, he asked. Hazel obviously knew the answer but her brain kept drawing blanks. It wasn’t until he named a few that she realized that she was among the list. “Valve disease, it runs in my family”, she answered finally. The question was a little surprising but, allowed Hazel to learn a bit more about Reece. Looking back, both of them have never actually spoke and truly, she did not know him personally.

Hazel believed it all would end there, but among the many faces, one blurted out, “But if you have heart problems, why do you smoke?””. The hairs on her arm raised, it was Jen. Hazel would be lying if she said that she didn’t know something like this was coming. It was a valid question, but one that didn’t have a straight answer. Yes, she was playing a dangerous game by smoking and was Hazel just selfish?

From being teary eyed, to now a freefall of tears. Hazel tried to gain her bearings and explain. “I don’t blame you for asking”, she started to speak. It was not a long story, but it was difficult for others to understand. “Freshman year, before I was told that I could have surgery . . . that’s when I started.” She shifted uncomfortably before continuing, “All through middle school, I was not afraid of dying, I wanted to die.” Maybe some were unaware of her past or how she was bullied, but they definitely did not know the last part. Nonetheless, it did not stop there. “I smoke a lot less now, since I’ve started feeling better in my head. It’s selfish of me to not stop, I know. I just . . . I feel like . . . I’m still in denial. I can’t come to terms with the fact that I’m dying, even after all this time. It’s stupid.” Her voice was filled with defeat and she covered her face to hide her tears.

@Kristi - Jacob
@LunaticLeviTheSecond - Reece
@eunoia - Jen

[Kristi]

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Jacob hated all this. He hated hearing the pain in her voice when she had said it meant so much for her. He hates seeing her pained expression and he wanted to kick himself for being such a cowardly jerk years ago when he had awkwardly ditched Hazel. He should have been braver, he should not have listened too… No, no he should not dwell to much on the past but soon what if all he has with Hazel is the past, like her existence. Jacob does not know what possessed him, he was not that fond of hugs as everyone knew and yet he reached out and wrapped his arms around Hazel.

This could very much be the last day he ever sees her, if the murder is still in school or if her heart decides to fail in a minute and he did not want her die without knowing how much Jacob truly cares for her. And though, yes Jacob is not expressing it with words, he was never that good with words,he had hoped that Hazel would be able to feel it with the hug. He lingered a little, perhaps one of his longest hug ever before he pulled away, scratching his neck as he stared at Alissa, Reece, Willow, Fern, Ollie, Jen, the rich boy and everyone else he might have forgotten to mention.

Damn, this shxt got even realer.

Jacob’s expression turned to a glare when Jennifer had asked why did Hazel still smoke even with her heart problems, “Why the fck would you ask that now JB” He turned to Hazel, his expression softening, “Hazel you don’t have to answer that, you should not…” Jacob said but Hazel had already began to answer and every word felt like stepping on hot stones to Jacob. “You’re not going to die Hazel, you can’t come to terms with the fac you’re dying because you re not going to die no matter what the valvarous vaseline or whatever it is heart disease said was going to happen.” Jacob said his expression had to read and his tone was almost like he was trying to conince himself find peace.

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@Detectives all of you mentioned technically