Beep… beep… beep… beep… beep…
Bright lights blinding him as he opened his eyes. Where was he? This place it felt… familiar. Andy opened his eyes slowly and found himself sat in a chair in a hospital room. Why was he in the hospital? Dazed and confused, Andy tried focusing as his vision was blurry for some reason.
His eyes widened and he felt an aching tug in his heart as he saw on the hospital bed next to him no other than Ziah, alive, laying there looking out of the window, connected to all these machines, the monitor beeping in his ears as he stood there frozen looking at her. ”You’re-…” he let out quietly stepping towards her. But- how-
”Mommy mommy!” little Kaya ran into the room with her little school bag on her back straight to her mother who smiled as soon as she saw the girl ”hey baby girl” she said with a soft smile and kissed the girl. This… it must be a memory. As he tried talking to them or even touching them, they didn’t seem to o notice a thing. And he knew that moment in his mind. After all, he remembered that day and how that day was going to end… he knew that in a moment he himself will walk through that door himself, and he did. So what was he now? A ghost? Was he dead? Was this hell? Was repeating the very last day with his wife his hell loop from now until eternity? Because if it was, it would be real torture.
There was nothing more painful than looking at Ziah and Kaya talking, Kaya all young with her little ponytail, telling her mother about her day at school with an excited childish voice and a smile on her face. Past and present Andy both looked at the two with a weak smile, taking in the moment as they both knew any day could be the last.
But neither of them but the spirit of present Andy knew this really was the last day. Once again, he was there, he remembered it all too well. Much too well. It was the kind of thing you don’t want to haunt your memory forever, you want to remember the happy moments, the good moments, not the last moments.
It wasn’t long until everything faded away and turned to a different moment, not so long after the previous one. There he was again, seeing himself at the same hospital room with his wife, but this time he was sat next to her, her hand in his own. She looked weak, and he remembered this was the very last time he ever saw her. The broken pieces of his heart just seemed to break all over again as he couldn’t hold back the tears. You’d think one would need a solid form to be able to cry… but here comes Andy to prove it all wrong. Sometimes the pain is enough to break even the strongest things there are.
”Take care of our little girl ” she said as they spoke, looking in each other’s eyes both filled with love and pain. And sometimes… love is the pain. This was one of those times. ”Don’t leave me, I need you…” he let out quietly ”i’ll never leave you silly. I’m always with you, right here” she added weakly reaching her hand to where his heart was.
”I love you rockstar” she said, and for a moment it felt like she was looking at him, present time him, not the one who was actually there. ”i love you too” both versions of him whispered together at the same time, planting a soft kiss on her forehead.
And that was the last thing he ever said to her. Because after that… she was no longer with us. She was gone forever, only present in heart, but he’d never get the chance to talk to her again, to hold her in his arms and just be there. Tell her how much he loved her just one more time, because it was never enough and no matter how many times he said it, those three little words were never enough to explain what was in his heart.
She was the one. She was his soulmate. People always doubt that soulmates exist, there isn’t the one, there are plenty of fish in the sea and once in a while you catch one on your hook. But that wasn’t the case for Andy. He didn’t get a fish, he found a hidden treasure at the bottom of the ocean, a rare and priceless pearl that he had the privilege of calling his wife. The love of his life. And just like that… life took her away from him. And it didn’t hurt any less than the first time. She wanted him to be happy, but it was so hard not to cry. It was impossible.
”I miss you… I’ll get better, I promise.”
Slowly regaining his blurry consciousness, Andy was at the hospital once again, but this time around, it was reality. And turns out he passed out when he came to see Jordan. You see… hospitals don’t bring the best of him, when to him they’re associated with the loss of the people he loved most. It just… it brought up all those memories and it just hurt too much.
Waking up, Andy opened his eyes slowly. Back to present time, present time where Kaya was already all grown up to a smart beautiful woman, and Andy… well he wasn’t doing too well. He was proud of his little girl, but he himself wasn’t really at the top of the world. He knew Ziah wanted him to find happiness… but it just didn’t seem to come around for him. He wished he could, it just wasn’t that easy. If there was just this sign from above or something,… he could just…
”Sadie…?”
@Littlefeets Ziah
@novella just imagine Sadie was there it’s a sign from above